Service-oriented people rarely plan for changes in service, the absence of someone or something to serve. The changes or silence hit differently than you expected. If your sense of self is organized around providing, losing that role can be bigger than grief alone; it can be destabilizing. This interactive discussion examines the difference between service as a practice and service as identity, and what happens when they collapse into each other. We’ll explore the grief of service change or loss, the shame that can surface when you are the one driving the need to stop, and the disorientation of not knowing who you are when you’re not useful. And we’ll sit with the question: who are you when there’s nothing or no one to serve?